Last night was the first INN of Winter Quarter. It was just a typical Tuesday night, full of skits and a video, music and a message, prayer and reflection on scripture. You know, just a normal Tuesday night at the INN.
Something was special about Tuesday night. Maybe it was because it'd been over three weeks since the INN community had gathered together. Maybe it was because the music team incorporated one of my favorite hymns into the worship set. Maybe it was because we had breakfast for dinner (i.e. brinner). Maybe it was because I got to sit with Lisa in the music office before her talk and get a little glimpse into what everyone would be listening to. Maybe it was all the coffee and lunch dates that once again have begun to fill my planner. Maybe it was looking through a window and seeing two of my closest friends singing with their eyes closed and their hands raised.
On Tuesday night I wandered about the church, never really settling down anywhere until the end of the night drew near. I sat in the hallway behind the alter underneath the light switches. My job for the night was about to become technical as the lights of the room needed to be raised and lowered to ensure everyone knew there would be a shift in the evening. And as I sat on the floor and looked over my minute-by-minute for the evening I began to hear harmonies and feel music within my chest...
"... then sings my soul, my Savior God to Thee, how great Thou art, how great Thou art...."
The music team was gone. I could not hear one instrument or vocalist from the music pit - the only sound that filtered through the cracks around the door to my little hallway was the group of voices gathered together. I closed my eyes and let it sink in. It was wonderful.
I stopped by BJ's on the way home. I sat on the floor of his living room with the top of my my head wet and my feet soaked by the rain. I looked up at him and tried to put into words how it felt to have this part of my life called the INN back in motion. Once again I have a purpose and structure to my day to day life. Once again I have time set aside to learn and reflect, to develop and grow, to serve and nurture - and I love it.
Now I am writing from a table in my favorite cozy coffee shop as I wait for my Thursday afternoon coffee date. I'm writing myself reminders in my notebook and thinking about life. So much has happened - so much is happening. A week ago I would tell you I was feeling overwhelmed by it all. But now, in this moment, I feel like I can process. I know this sounds silly because a week ago I had lots of free time and very little responsibility, a perfect opportunity to go through the emotions and dilemmas of life one step at a time. But right now life is just as it should be - busy and overflowing with blessings seen and unseen and amongst it all I feel like I can work through my life.
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